Letting Go and Going with His Flow: Part 3

Messy Motherhood

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Oh motherhood. Is there any better way to learn to go with the flow? This phase of life has taught me the most about letting go and going with God's flow...

If you want to learn how to go with the flow here's a simple four-step process:

1. Have a baby.
2. Invite friends over for a game night.
3. Put the baby to bed.
4. Watch the baby monitor in horror as your child screams at the top of his lungs and thwarts your plans of a fun relaxing evening with friends.

​I know, it sounds hilarious. But this is a true story. I'm telling you, a child knows no concept of plans or agenda. They only know what they want (or don't want) in the present moment.

There are hundreds of stories I could use from trying to conceive, to being pregnant, to caring for a newborn, to chasing a toddler. Every stage of motherhood is messy and chaotic, yet beautiful. And I believe the beauty comes out of the messy and chaotic.

Really, isn't all of life this way? We deal with messy situations and chaotic schedules at home, in the workplace, within relationships, and in our spiritual lives every day. And while the messy may be hard to deal with at times, it shows us the need to be flexible and understanding when our plans go up in smoke.

I have struggled with being flexible with change my entire life. I want it my way, in my time, and in my order. But through motherhood, God has shown me how to have fun getting messy while letting go of the control. (Not that I'm anywhere near mastering this, but we are all a work in progress.)

And while the messy may be hard to deal with at times, it shows us the need to be flexible and understanding when our plans go up in smoke. "

Motherhood is a forever learning curve. Every time you reach a point where you feel like you got this and being a mom is a breeze, your child will begin to teethe, or he'll enter the terrible two's, or she'll suffer a major sleep regression.

It takes but a small change to create huge waves of unknowns. But the beautiful part of it all--this child in front of you (whether he's crying or laughing) is learning and growing and becoming a person all his own. And you have a front row seat to watch your little flower blossom.

It's a parallel to how God sees us in our lives. In the good times, and the awful times, we are experiencing life and growing and learning. And God is right there. He's comforting us in the bad. Guiding us in the unknowns and insecurities. And cheering us on in the good.

And with a God like that in our lives, why do we need to worry about planning and controlling all the things?

Here are the aspects of motherhood that have ingrained this mindset into me the most:

• Motherhood is unpredictable. Being a mother has brought to my knees in prayer hundred of times. While I know my son's personality and his likes and dislikes, I can't predict how he's going to feel or what he's going to do from one day to the next. And many times, I find myself giving my day over to God because I won't survive it by going about my own agenda.
• Motherhood is a blessing. No matter the stage, having a child to care for and raise up into adulthood is a blessing. Through the tears and the urge to pull my hair out when he's throwing a tantrum, to the overflow of love in my soul as my son reaches for my hand when we pray at the dinner table, I'm learning the blessings of messy and out of control.
• Motherhood is challenging. There's no perfect road map to get you through motherhood. Every single parenting book out there will contradict the next one, because everyone has different philosophies, priorities, and lives. Not to mention, each child develops differently, so planning the exact road to follow for parenting is pointless. 

Learning to go with the flow is a never ending lesson...at least for me. But being a mother and watching my son live in the moment (and often being forced to live in the moment with him) has brought me a long way.

Do I still have my planner? You bet. Am I still blocking off the days for when we begin potty training? Yep. Do I meal plan? Absolutely.

But I now use a pencil when I used to use a pen or marker. Because let's face it, with a young child running around, you learn to hide the permanent ink.